A Sigh of Relief

Baby McKenzie is home.  She is banged up, bruised, and swollen, but she is with her family, comforted in her mother’s arms.

Some of the financial support you all are so graciously providing has is already getting to the family.  Lani wanted me to let you all know how deeply thankful she and her family are for your beautiful outpouring of affection.

If you haven’t had the opportunity to do so, the ribbon is over there on the right.

The Days After

Blogging is not a common thing in my neck of the woods.  We have a few that I really enjoy – Chris Cree, Anne Hart, The Paragon Muse, and Creative Coast are my most visited.  But, blogging is still cutting edge, so, many folks don’t “get” blogging.

If they had seen what happened around here this week – they would.

People who are virtual friends – only a few face to face – rallied around one of our own.  Lani’s family needed us, and we were there.  We are still here.

I want to say thank you to all these kind people who posted, supported, gave, and honored. 

I want to encourage you to continue to support this young family.  The green ribbon is at the top to your right.

When Lani Hurts, the Chaos is Broken

Lani has been here at The Chaos for a brief time.  But before that, she was my friend.  During that time, she has become one of my best friends, my closest confidant, and you guys seem to like her being here too.

I usually write the way I talk…but I have no words…

Lani’s wonderful baby brother was killed yesterday in a car wreck.  Her words can be found here…

Mine are lost…

Lani wants to know how you promote social justice

AnaweimThis article is a MUST READ from beginning to end, and comments are highly encouraged: 

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Each Saturday, my husband and I head to mass because we’re both hard wired to sleep in on Sundays. Well, sleep in until 7:30am at least. Recently, I began taking RCIA (Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults) to become officially Catholic. I say “officially” because I was raised in the Episcopal faith (Catholic faith minus the Pope and consequences to actions) and have been going to my church for five-ish years now- it’s time to be confirmed! I tell you all of this to introduce you to my current mindset. When taking classes of any kind, it is natural for anyone to desire sharing their newly learned information.

Today’s readings focused on social justice and caring for the people on the margins of society. Regardless of your religious preference, we can all agree that we should strive to care for those that are abused, impoverished and hopeless. After spirited debate, I wanted to share with you two things I learned:

First:
Ezra Taft Benson noted that “The Lord works from the inside out. The world works from the outside in. The world would take people out of the slums. Christ takes the slums out of people, and then they take themselves out of the slums. The world would mold men by changing their environment. Christ changes men, who then change their environment. The world would shape human behavior, but Christ can change human nature.”

I love this quote. It really touches on what is the focus of my husband’s current Micro-Financing Challenge (Micro-Financing is a fancy word for charitably donating money even if just $25 to give loans to small business owners to give them the ability to strengthen their suffering communities). I really want you to check it out!

Secondly:
People of need (most notably starving people) used to be called “anaweim.” The Book of Amos was written in 721 BC and in that time, one of the ways communities cared for their “anaweim” by “gleaming.” During the harvesting process (of wheat, for example) with the dull blades of their tools, many stalks of wheat would be bent over instead of cut cleanly, while others would be only partially cut down with leftover remaining. The tradition was that all farmers LEFT those broken and bent pieces behind for the anaweim. The theory is that God provided that crop for the farmer and it wasn’t the farmer’s to begin with, so with that in mind, gleaming shouldn’t be a difficult practice.

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Which practice do you think YOU could most easily adapt to promote social justice- Micro-Financing or gleaming?

The Fiesta is Chaotic

Big Thanks to Todd Carpenter over at Blog Fiesta for inviting Lani and I to come over and play.  Todd has been interviewing bloggers in the real estate and mortgage industry for a while.  He has built up quite the list.

In a small twist, Todd didn’t do the interviews.  He let us interview each other.  Fortunate for us, that’s what our emails back and forth typically look like anyway, so this wasn’t a stretch – just a bit more focused.

Lani’s interview features a great picture…and she says stuff too – something about a blushing cheeseburger in the shower (you all know how strange that dear friend of mine can be).

My interview turns to a crazy type at the end.  So you can’t see that my favorite RE blogs are

Thanks so much for inviting us over, Todd.  You have proved yourself one brave guy :)

**Update – Lani has a great clip included in her take on the interviews.
**Update – Todd fixed the type – Thanks! 

The Village doesn’t get my kids until it becomes way less fishy

Topic of parenting came up.  Surprise, I know.  But, the topic was “Make a Difference.”  Really, what did you think I would write about?

Rosa, whom I adore, says there is greatness in “it take a village.”  Rosa is right.  Except, when the village is corrupt, you have to know when to tell the village to get out of your house.

Now understand I am not going to claim some moral high ground about what I do and don’t allow in my house.  I like the Sopranos.  I watch it – after the kids go to bed.  Understand I am not telling you how to raise your kids.  I am telling you that I have four daughters – if you think that’s a walk in the park, I invite you to the beauty of my chaos.

Times have changed.  Yes they have.  I love hearing people say that things really aren’t that different from when we were growing up. Are you kidding?  Lohan, Spears, and Hilton make it different.  Why? Because they are not the exception, they are the norm.  Madonna was a shocker.  Girls wanted to be like her because it was rebellious. 

Today this is not rebellion – it is not being different or expressing yourself.  Girls understanding their place as sexual beings is the way it is supposed to be.  The media no longer objectifies them – we have come so far that we have taught our children to objectify themselves!  It has become so common that we don’t even notice it when it happens.

Example: Lead actress from High School Musical  decides she’s going to take some bra and panty pictures and send them via email (huh?) to her boyfriend.  They become public (shock!).  Now, I understand she wasn’t naked, is of legal age, and few people outside of the HSM demographic know who she is.  That makes it ok, right? Wrong!  The persona that she portrays is that of a high school girl.  The HSM soundtrack was the number one selling album last year.  Your preteen daughters can dress up like her for Halloween, theme their birthday party, and probably recite the words from the movie.  She was set up in the public as the girl that all other girls should want to be like. 

Example:  Music CD’s marketed for children.  These albums take popular songs and have kids singing them.  This makes them kid friendly right?  Wrong!  Just because kids are singing Girlfriend, Irreplaceable, and Lips of an Angel does not make the lyrics any different. They are still the types of songs I can only listen to when my kids aren’t in the car.

Example: Little Mermaid.  This fish has been banned from my home and my kids know it.  Why?  Let me break down the story for you.  Little fish Ariel is turning 16 – that’s right 16.  On the dawn of her birthday party she flounces off to a place her father has forbidden her to go.  During the course of things, she sees this guy (sees not meets) that is obviously not 16.  She falls madly in love (remember being 16).  But, she’s a mermaid and this guy lives on the land.  No problem, evil squid offers to give her legs if Ariel will give up her beautiful singing voice.  It’s a good trade according to the evil squid – Ariel can use her “body language” and if the guy kisses her within three days, she can have her voice back.  So, little fish runs away from home after giving up all her talents to chase after some older guy she has never even met.  The body language thing works, he kisses her, they get married and everybody is okay with this.  Are you kidding me? 

Could I go on?  You bet.  Little girls who are dying to own pants with “sweetness” written across the bottom.  Clapped for when they nail they latest dance moves that look a whole lot like pole dancing.  Giggled at when they cop some attitude and use very grown up phrases to disrespect their parent’s friends.  Allowed to use terms like “boyfriend” and “dating” before they even hit middle school.  You bet I could go on.

I love the “it takes a village” in theory.  The accountability, the diversity, the help is wonderful.  But the village has traded it’s one idiot for a marketful and many of us have become so complacent and the methods so common, we don’t even notice it.

I don’t know what the answer is for the village.  Maybe you can offer some suggestions.  For the moment, all I can do attempt to keep it and its fish off my doorstep.

Lani Wants You to Eat Your Way to Productivity

yumm-food.jpgA lot of tips fly around April’s Beautiful Chaos about how to increase your productivity and Lifehacker found this amazing list of the Top 100 Foods To Improve Your Productivity!  It looks like every food on earth is included except for my favorite food- BEEF (I couldn’t call myself a Texan if I didn’t chomp a cow at at least twice daily).

Good news- cheese, milk, green tea (mmm Arizona Tea), potatoes and dark chocolate made the list!  No wonder I clean the house like a productive person crackhead!

The Insanity of Waking a Sleeping Baby

It is a rare thing for me to wake a sleeping baby. I have been blessed with big, healthy newborns. I will check on them if they have been sleeping a while – but I don’t wake them up. Not for a schedule, not for a meal. I sleep when they sleep and if they are hungry, they will wake up and let the whole world know.

The other night was a rare thing. I had back to back evening meetings and got home after bedtime. I spent time winding down and watching a little TV with my beloved. Time to go to bed for me – not so much for him.

Before I walk into the bedroom, I check on the children. All is well. And there is the littlest one. So sweet in her little pajamas. I decide she can sleep with me.

This move will probably wake her up. She may not go directly back to sleep. I consider it then decide I don’t care. The mommy in me really needs to spend some cuddles with the daughter in her.

I scoop her up, walk down the hall, and we both lay down. She wakes up. But she isn’t angry. In fact, she seems quite happy with the situation. She has that sleepy smile. She giggles a bit. Smiles some more. “Talks” to me for a while. More giggles. Then she scoots close, lays her head down, puts that little thumb in her mouth, and goes back to sleep. I follow suit – minus the thumb.

I still think in most cases it’s insane to wake a sleeping baby – but I am all for being crazy every once in a while.

My September 11th Heroes

The size of this day is almost too much.  One almost cannot even begin to comprehend it when taken in its entirety.  I won’t even attempt it.  I honor of all those affected by that day, I want to thank those that impacted my life directly.

I have told the story about where I was.  This is what happened next.

The base was put on lockdown.  We were instructed that those of us who lived in military housing with our families would need to put a plan together immediately to evacuate them.  The fear was that our chance of being a target was great.  We were right outside of Chicago and the home of the largest Naval training facility.

Madison was 4 and Savannah was 2 months old.   Mark and I decided that should the call go out to evacuate, the three of them would go home to Georgia.  I would try to get home as soon as I could to help him pack.

I had just been promoted and they had not updated my ID card.  This meant my ID and my uniform did not match.  Usually not a big deal – but this was no where near “usually.”  My superior officers decided it was best if I went home and did not attempt to come back on to the main base until a runner could bring me the necessary paperwork.

By the time I got to base housing, there were big concrete barriers blocking all the entrances except one.  The main entrance was also equipped with these same barriers forming a maze forcing those who entered to do so slowly.  The guard shack was manned with armed security forces.  This would be the norm for a long time to come.

The order never came to evacuate our families.  I was thankful.  Although I was the military member, I always feel safer when Mark is around.  After a while, we attempted to regain some sense of a normal routine.

The first time Madison saw the guards at the entrance, she was bewildered.  The second time she had questions.  Why were they there?  Where had they been before?  Why do they have guns?  Is it because of the planes?

As I am sure many of you know, explaining the events of September 11th to a 4 year old is not easy.  Tip toeing on truth and appropriateness while maintaining a delicate balance of awareness and safety is no small feat.

Yes, they are there because of the planes.  They have guns to make sure that bad folks can’t hurt you.  They are here to help Mommy and Daddy keep you safe.

“Sure does look like they are cold out there,” Madison commented.  She was right – they sure did look cold.  We brought them coffee that they wouldn’t take.  Of course they wouldn’t – I knew better.  It’s a security precaution.  But, Madison was satisfied that they were okay out there, and they knew we appreciated them.

We really appreciated them.

These guys protected my home with force and at the risk of life.  Seems dramatic now, but the fear was very real then.  They did more than stand watch at the gate of housing, they gaurded the gate of my baby’s fear.  Mommy and Daddy would never let anything happen to her or her new baby sister, and these guys were going to make sure of it.

Thank you to all the men and women who stood watch outside of Great Lakes housing.  You kept my family safe.  Thank you to all those who continue to stand watch around the world.  You continue to provide that safety.  You are supported and appreciated.

This space reserved for Pavarotti

Like Athol, I am not a opera buff.  I would like to be as it amazes me, but I think it may be the language barrier – I don’t know.  At any rate, I was still moved when I found out that the great Pavarotti had passed.

But don’t stop here.  Jump on over to Athol’s house and see the amazing duet with James Brown!