Until now. Understand that I still think it is ridiculous to get excited over refereeing, outcome or play time. However, I have found the situation that has the potential of getting me on YouTube. And I can’t promise I will be embarrassed or sorry.

I love kids’ sports. I think it is awesome to watch children learn, run, jump, play, win and try again. I love to cheer for my children and listen to other people cheer for theirs. Most of the parents in this community know and like each other. Our children like each other. We understand the nature of friendship and competition. We are sportsmanlike and respectful.

I appreciate the excitement that comes from an opposing team when theirs are beating ours. I don’t begrudge them that. I get it. I root hard too.

I tend to get irritated at those who choose to take on the black and white stripes and attempt to call the game from the bleachers. But, I can handle that as well.

What I have found that I cannot tolerate is my child’s name – or number – coming out of another parent’s mouth in a harsh and ugly way. The first time it was irritating. The second time it was grinding. The third time I looked at my husband and let him know there would only be one more time. He laughed. I know what he is thinking about me – you can take the girl out the trailer but you can’t take the trailer out the girl. There was one more time.

He saw my eyes flash. He reminded me who I was and what I knew to be true. I gritted my teeth. In the infamous declaration of Tyler “Madea” Perry, “Jesus just saved your life, Hallelu-yer!”

While you all are very supportive and some of my great friends, I just didn’t feel like blogging. I didn’t really feel like doing anything. But, as it was, I had tons I had to do so I didn’t do anything that wasn’t imperative. I knew you guys would understand.

His memorial was last night. While I still don’t want to do a whole lot, I know Greg and I know his life – it was fun and he brought fun to all those around him. He would still want to bring the fun.

And I think hanging out with you guys is fun…

So, in loving memory of my wonderful friend Greg, this is your American Idol.

We all knew it was coming and it was a whole lot of fun. The kids fed the ducks, fished a little bit, rode in the golf cart and blew bubbles.They ate too much and played too hard. Presents were opened and toys assembled. People socialized and some caught up a bit with those they hadn’t seen in a while. It was a great day.

Funny how the best of days still leave you with a sense of longing. I guess knowing that you will never get that cake face back, knowing that we have already accomplished a lot of firsts – Christmas, Halloween, Love Day – those firsts are over.

I realize I have a good many firsts to still look forward to. I am thankful to have such a full life with a full house.

Funny the variety of emotions that accompany being a mom…

This is also the week that I have to get over the fact that we are experiencing our last first birthday. Four babies is enough for our family. I am thrilled to pieces with the gifts we have been given – but, I’ll pass the bows on to somebody else

Still, babies do something to a house. First birthdays do something to the soul. Squishy is already a year old, and I will admit to that being bitter sweet. But, she doesn’t make it official with cake on the face until this weekend – so I have some time to rejoice and mourn…until the next big milestone.

It is no secret that I get pretty riled up over the current state of the over sexed, over objectified, under responsible promotion of youth. I am irritated by The Little Mermaid, collagen lipped dolls, and in your face teenage pregnancy. We attempt to instill in our girls that they are beautiful tea cups, masterpieces even, and that they have the personal responsibility to protect their character, reputation, and moral fortitude. We attempt not to shelter, but to remain age appropriate.

Some things are fairly cut and dry. Shaving isn’t one of them. I wonder what I will say when they ask for the razor? I am not sure what age I feel is appropriate. What I do remember is being told “no” when I first asked – middle school I think. I also remember the whole ordeal being very embarrassing on an appearance level.

But the whole act of leg shaving seems so grown up. Almost suggestive. When a woman is getting ready for a night out, she surely shaves her legs – even in the winter. When said evening goes bad, the “I shaved my legs for this?” question gets asked.

I dunno…the lovely grey area of parenting.

*Photo by Jyn Meyer

First, the video

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As a parent, I find the data shocking. Unfortunately, I know little about how to combat it. The major reason for this post is to do the same thing as Angela did – ask for ideas. There seems to be a disconnect somewhere…bureaucracy maybe…I don’t know. But there has to be a proactive idea out there that has worked.

I am wondering – is it time to reinvent the wheel? Or, has it already been done and not enough people know about it?

I know I have some educators, parents, and all around smart folks that honor me with visits here. If ever there was a time to kick in your two cents – now is it.

16 year old Jamie Lynn Spears is pregnant (yes, that Spears). And before I get started, lemme say…

Yes, I was once a teenage girl that did things I shouldn’t have been doing when my parents weren’t looking. Yes, I understand parents can’t watch their children all the times or make decisions for them as they become a young adults. Yes, I get the fact that some times smart kids do stupid things. Yes, I understand that this must be a very emotional time for Jamie Lynn and her family and I wish them all the best of health and happiness.

However…

I did a surf of the net after I saw some pictures on the news and heard the story. I won’t post pictures or links because a) I don’t want them on my blog b) some most of the links are totally tabloid and c) smart people visit here and I am sure you can find it yourself.

I have to tell you, the whole thing really upset me. The father of the baby is her 19 year old boyfriend. Believe it or not, I have no issue with the age difference.

I do have an issue with the pictures. I understand that she is a TV personality. But she is still somebody’s 16 year old daughter. Which means, hot pants, miniskirts, knee high boots, barely there tops and letting her “girls” breath is a bit…well, not age appropriate. I am confused at what point this objectification of teenage girls became ok. Moreover, why is she able to carry a show on Nickelodeon? You know, the channel for kids? I will stop here on that point as I am frustrated and will not be guilty of saying ugly things.

I also have issues with the fact that he is described as her “live in boyfriend.” While I concede that may or may not be true – one thing surely is. There is a growing trend of children (and they are still children) being allowed to engage in serious relationships where they are allowed to spend crazy amounts of time behind closed doors with parental permission. I hear stories all the time of kids being able to spend the night in the homes of their object of affection. There are tons of pictures being passed around by parents of their cute little teenager and their cute little boyfriend or girlfriend huddled up on couches, snuggled up in arms, and making cute little kissie faces. Seriously, are you serious? Nothing about children behaving like newlyweds is cute.

It seems to fall in line with the “let them do it (whatever “it” is) in my house since they are just going to do it anyway.” When did we start expecting the worst of our children? At what point did parenting become damage control?

That’s enough parental rant for one day. Pray for me as my husband and I attempt to raise four beautiful girls through this over-sexed, feel good, so boys will like me society.

P.S. Notice I didn’t mention the possibility of this being a result of her big sister’s influence. Why? Because while the point may have merit, it is still a parent’s job to raise their children – not the siblings.

I was first introduced to The Tea Cup Story through Dannah Gresh’s Secret Keeper Girls. It is the story my daughter and I listened to on our first date.

Carolyn posted the story to talk about women creating a personal reality. She does a wonderful job and you should read her thoughts.

I want to repost this story and talk about little girls.

There was a couple who used to go to England to shop in the beautiful stores. They both liked antiques and pottery and especially teacups. This was their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary.

One day in this beautiful shop they saw a beautiful teacup. They said, “May we see that? We’ve never seen one quite so beautiful.”

As the lady handed it to them, suddenly the teacup spoke. “You don’t understand,” it said. “I haven’t always been a teacup.

There was a time when I was brown and I was clay. My master took me and rolled me and patted me over and over and I yelled out, ‘let me alone’, but he only smiled, ‘Not yet.’

“Then I was placed on a spinning wheel,” the teacup said, “and suddenly I was spun around and around and around. Stop it! I’m getting dizzy! I screamed. But the master only nodded and said, ‘Not yet.’

Then he put me in the oven. I never felt such heat. I wondered why he wanted to burn me, and I yelled and knocked at the door. I could see him through the opening and I could read his lips as he shook his head, ‘Not yet.’

Finally the door opened, he put me on the shelf, and I began to cool. ‘There, that’s better,’ I said. And he brushed and painted me all over. The fumes were horrible. I thought I would gag. ‘Stop it, stop it!’ I cried. He only nodded, ‘Not yet.’

Then suddenly he put me back into the oven, not like the first one. This was twice as hot and I knew I would suffocate. I begged. I pleaded. I screamed. I cried. All the time I could see him through the opening nodding his head saying, ‘Not yet.’

Then I knew there wasn’t any hope. I would never make it. I was ready to give up. But the door opened and he took me out and placed me on the shelf. One hour later he handed me a mirror and said, ‘Look at yourself. And I did.

I said, ‘That’s not me; that couldn’t be me. It’s beautiful. I’m beautiful.’

‘I want you to remember, then,’ he said, ‘I know it hurts to be rolled and patted, but if I had left you alone, you’d have dried up.

I know it made you dizzy to spin around on the wheel, but if I had stopped, you would have crumbled. I knew it hurt and was hot and disagreeable in the oven, but if I hadn’t put you there, you would have cracked.

I know the fumes were bad when I brushed and painted you all over, but if I hadn’t done that, you never would have hardened; you would not have had any color in your life.

And if I hadn’t put you back in that second oven, you wouldn’t survive for very long because the hardness would not have held. Now you are a finished product. You are what I had in mind when I first began with you.

Dannah talks about the difference between a Styrofoam cup, a coffee mug, and an elegant tea cup. She does a beautiful job linking this metaphor to the thought that how we present ourselves to the world dictates a great deal of how we will be treated by it.

It is my humble opinion that much of what the media attempts to put into our home encourage styrofoam cupness. Give up you talents, use your body, if it feels good do it, sex sells, everybody is doing it, modesty is over rated, and host of other things that is a far cry from raising independent, smart, strong women.

I am very serious about raising women of integrity. So much so that presents are debated over amongst family members before they are given to my children. We don’t have scantily clad Barbies or play dolls with attitudes whose main focus is on the “bling.” I am cautious about what my children watch, hear and wear. I am not sheltering. Exposure happens and we let it. We turn it into what I can only hope are teachable moments.

I write this post not to criticize or lift up my awesome parenting skills, but to solicit help from others who are attempting this same feat. I know I am not in the minority concerning our children.

And alas – I can only speak to raising girls. I would love to hear if the Tea Cup story (or a variation of) applies to boys. I have always thought I would have made a fantastic “boy mom.” But I can only imagine the difficulty it must be to raise Men of Integrity as well.

When I take my kids to McDonald’s, I completely expect an unhealthy meal – I don’t care what kind of alternatives they offer. It’s not health food.

What I don’t expect are half dressed grown woman dolls to be the toy.  Think I am exaggerating?  Judge for yourself.

If you think I would let my kids out of the house looking like that, or with people that looked like that – think again and make a doctor’s appointment because you are obviously ill.

And please don’t tell me about having to let my children grow up and become their own person.  These are Happy Meals.  The target audience is birth through elementary school.  And allowing my children to become their own person does not include condoning trashy clothes.

And lest you think I am overreacting – I am not alone.

Marcie Press thinks like me

…and Chrissy

…and Beverly

…and Jessica

Misogynist Happy Meals - does a great job of taking McD’s to task over the “global mom network.”

I am trying really hard to be rational.  But, I am raising 4 daughters in a society that has gone from being angry when women are objectified to one that has women objectifying themselves.  I mean, really, is this what we want for our children – boys or girls?

We become aghast at Brittney, Lindsay, Paris, and Nicole.  We wag our finger, shake our heads, and wonder how they could be so reckless.  We hear of the young teenage girls with babies, diseases, eating disorders and wonder where her parents are.  Girls gone wild, underage activity, birth control in middle school and we wonder what’s wrong with other people’s children.

We just don’t understand how it had come to all this.  Meanwhile, isn’t it so cute that our little angel knows all the words to Fergalicious, has “Cheer” written across her bottom, rolls her eyes at the grocery store clerk, and knows we are going to buy her all the Bratz dolls we forgot about last Christmas.

Really…

Speaking of waiting, I still have not heard from one person with a suggestion of one thing that the government has taken over and made better. You may continue to ponder and I am always open.

Everybody back? Great.

They took my baby’s cold medicine. They took yours too. It actually scared me a bit. Phone rings – it’s my very excited mother.

“Turn on the news. They have done a recall of the children’s cold medicine. They didn’t say what was wrong, they just went to a commercial.”

Ok – first of all, how in the world do you get away with teasing a news story about a recall for children’s medicine? That sounds like serious threat to life. That sounds like, “we interrupt this program for this breaking news alert” stuff. Not teaser material.

Except, there is nothing wrong with the medicine. That’s right – nothing. I asked my pediatrician myself, just to make sure. Nothing wrong with it. But, it’s recalled – you can’t buy it.

Seems as though some parents, some times, may have given their children overdoses of medication. So, because some parents may give some children too much cold medicine, I can’t give mine any. But, it’s all about the children.

No, it’s not. It’s all about politics. I can’t get cold medicine for my kids when they get coughs, runny noses, congestion, the like. I can use the vapors and saline and stuff, but I have not seen them to be as effective. So, in order to get medicine for my kid, I have to pay to go to the doctor. The doctor will run labs that will probably show up negative for everything – but you don’t pay for that based on the result – you pay for it period. Then the doctor will write a prescription – you’ll pay for that. Then the doctor will say he needs to see you back to check everything out – and you’ll pay for that.

• side note – Insurance, medicare, health clinic, military, benefits – whatever – you are still paying for that. It’s called taxes and insurance premiums. Increased health care cost will not equal decreased revenue for the government or the insurance companies. It will equal reduced care and increased premiums and taxes.

So now, health care cost for your family just went up. Nobody likes that. Now all of a sudden you hear about the fabulous “S” chip for health care…it will take care of the children and it won’t cost you a thing

• except taxes
• and it will include “children” up to the age of 25 in homes with an income of up to $82,000 a year.

Whatever. Give me back my cold medicine and you can keep your “free health care.”

Thought that occurred to me. Think about all the other things parents might sometimes do that some of the folks in the medical community may disagree with.

• Give cow milk before 12 months
• peanut butter before age 2
• eggs before 12 months
• rice cereal before 4 months

You gonna take all of that from me too? In the meantime, you’ll give my middle schooler birth control without my knowledge or consent. But, I can’t give her sister cold medicine.

Really…