First, let me acknowledge that this is a difficult post to write. The issues are so amazingly intertwined, personal and varied, The written word can be so difficult to convey accurate meaning. But, I think there has been a point that may have been overlooked and I would like to talk about it.

Second, let me say I think I might have voted “no” in North Carolina. I am not certain that I would have, but I think the inclusion of civil unions was an over reach. I also think that if the goal is to “defend marriage” then we should probably vote on some new divorce laws. The ones we have are far more destructive to the sanctity of marriage. You can read my full thoughts here (and I would highly suggest you do so if you plan on trolling or flaming the comments – thanks).

Third, yep, I am Catholic. I hear a whole bunch of folks just dismiss my whole opinion. And therein lies a big part of the problem (and my point). But, I will get to that. Instead, I would like to reiterate my thoughts on laws and religion for those of you who did not read the above linked post.

The more often we come to the coffee shop, the more often you will hear that idea - my particular religious beliefs cannot be the sole argument for legislative decision-making. I have spent an awful lot of time on an awful lot of subjects applying that code.

When I woke up yesterday, North Carolina was getting slammed for the vote which resulted in the 61%-39% passage of their marriage law defining the union, to include civil unions, as an institution reserved for a man and a woman. They are the 30th state to do so. Not the first. Not the minority. I find that curious.

They are then blasted along the interwebs for hating homosexuals, inciting domestic violence, being southern, religious nutjobs, and a variety of other things. And my thoughts ponder more.

The President comes out and gives a beautiful speech where he discusses the issue. He eloquently states support for gay marriage and indicates that this newly held position is a result of his “evolution”.

And the record scratches.

There lies the crux of the problem, in my opinion. I would wager that society at large (the majority in a majority of states), could care less about limiting the rights of homosexuals or anybody else for that matter. But quite frankly, Christian (78% of the US population in 2009) conservatives (40% versus 35% moderate, 21% liberal in 2009) are a bit freaked out. Note: I included the percentages because my freaked out self is tired of hearing how in the minority I am and how my fringe beliefs are ridiculous

I would bet that if you sat down most folks that voted “yes” on Tuesday and asked them if gay couples should be able to buy a home together, visit each other in the hospital, serve as each others beneficiary and decision maker, be together until the day they die, raise children, and all the other characteristics that make folks “married”, they would say “sure”.

So why have the majority of people in the majority of states decided to vote against it? Because we don’t trust it.

And by “it” I am NOT talking about gay marriage. I am talking about respect to religious liberty. And we don’t trust it because we have already been taken to the races and we know which dog wins – and it ain’t ours.

I appreciate freedom of religion. (Side note: “of” and “from” are two different words – I understand the difference). I respect religious tolerance. However, society at some point has decided that “tolerance” means that I have to agree, support, and acquiesce to all other religious beliefs and can expect to be berated as a hateful beast when I hope for the same treatment.

Prayer at any event, nativities in the park, Ten Commandment replicas, public declarations of faith, “Merry Christmas” at a retail outlet, school children reciting the pledge or learning God Bless America – ridiculed, litigated, and trashed.

Admonishments of  ”stay out of my bedroom, it’s none of your business!” heralded far and wide. Until it is time to pay for abortions, birth control, day care, welfare, or medical care. Guess where the tax payers and the church are expected to be then?

“Keep your religion to yourself!” Until a priest denies someone communion, a pastor admonishes the behavior of a parishioner, or clergy within a church decides who can fill what roles in their organization. Then that church become fair game to everyone else. The practices and opinions of the church are expected to bend and form to public opinion – the same public that denounces its right to interact with it…huh?

So, while I will stop short of aligning with the vote, I will say I can understand why. We don’t want to be in the public bedroom, but we are consistently dragged into it. And, quite frankly, this, like so many other things, is none of my business. And many will agree. But, like so many other things before, it will be made our business. We will once agree to live and let live and later find that action, yet again, unreciprocated.

Makes me think that’s what happens when folks continue to live in the extreme and think that to be the norm. This ain’t Jersey Shore and not everything is a picket line. I have long been done allowing the media to convince me of that. The rights of all people will be better served when being a politician ceases to be a six or seven-figure income, when extremist on both sides are seen for what they are – extremist who have their own agenda, when rational people talk in rational ways and refuse to allow differences to negate respect and love.

But hey, who I am? I need to go evolve…

I mean I heard rumors once that Tiger was going to buy a house out in the Ford Plantation, but I am pretty sure that never happened.

So I feel pretty comfortable telling you that he does not live in Richmond Hill. While that may make a difference in the way that I feel, I am not sure it would make it any less true.

If you have been living free of any kind of media and have no idea why I am talking about Tiger, stop reading now. If you don’t know, trust me , you don’t to.

Tiger’s decision to return to the game of golf at the Masters Tournament at Augusta is being hailed as brilliant – and it is. Augusta is exclusive (understatement), sought after (understatement), and particular (big understatement). If Tiger can play anywhere without being heckled and bothered, it is Augusta.

Except Masters Chairman, Billy Payne, decided a soapbox address with some small offers of grace was a good idea. And Arnold Palmer (who I love!) thinks that Tiger should “open up and just let you guys [reporters] shoot at him.”

Since I hadn’t even had my first cup of coffee during the SportsCenter run down, I was ornerier than usual. I jumped up and exclaimed to my beloved, “Why is any of this any of their business?”

My hubby agreed and made the comment that Tiger isn’t special, this kind of thing happens all the time.

That doesn’t do it for me. If it had never happened before, it would still be none of my business.

It is the business of his wife, his family, those women and his advertisers – none of those groups do I belong to. Actually, Tiger could choose to cut that last group out, but my knowledge of marketing says that they deserve to be there.

Why should Tiger hold another press conference? Why does a guy in a green jacket get to make public comments on it? Why do the SportCenter mouths get to assert that Tiger has a lot of unanswered questions to address?

Go ahead and tell me because he is a public figure and he put himself in that position. I would almost buy that one – heck I think I have said it before. But that was some years ago when as a society we just hoped one day we would know. Today, we have this sense that we deserve to be inside the freaking counseling room with him and his wife!

As the public, we have to decide if we buy his product, support his brand and champion his cause. This creates the chance that he may invite us into the knowledge of his personal business. It does not make us entitled to it.

Best of luck to all of those in Augusta – Tiger too.